Teachers Tell of the Tintillating Tidbits of Tots & Teens

From the mouths of babes, as told to us by teachers.

FOR SALE BY OWNER ( A teacher in the U.K)

Complete set of Encyclopedia Britannica, 45 volumes.

Excellent condition, £200 or best offer. No longer needed, got married, wife knows everything.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

And, now a collection from right here on the other side of the pond: 

Teacher Appreciation: 

'Kids are quicker and more alert than we often realize!'

TEACHER: Why are you late?

STUDENT: Class started before I got here.

____________________________________

TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?

JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables.

__________________________________________

TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell 'crocodile?'

GLENN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L'

TEACHER: No, that's wrong

GLENN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.

(I Love the alertness and precision of this child)

____________________________________________

TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?

DONALD: H I J K L M N O.

TEACHER: What are you talking about?

DONALD: Yesterday you said it's H to O.

__________________________________

TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.

WINNIE: Me!

______________________________________

TEACHER: Glen, why do you always get so dirty?

GLEN: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.

_______________________________________

TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with ' I. '

MILLIE: I is..

TEACHER: No, Millie..... Always say, 'I am.'

MILLIE: All right... 'I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.'

________________________________

TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father’s cherry tree, but also admitted it.

Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him?

LOUIS: Because George still had the axe in his hand.....

______________________________________

TEACHER: Now, Simon , tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?

SIMON: No sir, I don't have to, my Mum is a good cook.

______________________________

TEACHER: Clyde , your composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your brother's..

Did you copy his?

CLYDE : No, sir. It's the same dog.

(Who wants to adopt this kid!!!)

_________________________

TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?

HAROLD: A teacher
__________________________________

Now, for those of you who enjoy images, visit the accompanying cartoons.

Please note:

Due to current economic conditions and global climate change, the light at the end of this endless tunnel has been turned off.  However, please feel free to add your own teacher-student questions and answers in the comments below.